The road to Starrcade is underway, WCW Nitro is LIVE from the Popst Arena in Huntsville, Alabama!
“Party Hardy” opens the show along with the standard pyro and we are ringside with Joey Styles & Jerry “The King” Lawler. Here is the new WCW President, Ric Flair opening the show! He is stylin’ and profilin’ his way to the ring in a suit as the ring is set up for a contract signing.
Flair takes a mic and quickly addresses the crowd. He says as WCW President, he wants to see the best wrestle the best, especially with the ultimate prize in the sport of professional wrestling on the line with the WCW World Heavyweight championship. At Starrcade, the two best in WCW will enter this ring and battle it out and one will be victorious and one man will walk out the Undisputed World Heavyweight champion of the world! Flair says it’s time to get this started, so it’s time for the challenger to sign on the dotted line. Booker T’s music hits on queue and here comes the heart and soul of WCW, Booker T!
Booker joins Flair in the ring and the two shake hands. Flair holds out a pen, and Booker quickly grabs it and signs the contract. Flair then calls out the champion. “BANG!” and here comes Diamond Dallas Page! Page comes to the ring alone without any Foundation backup.
He enters the ring and Flair extends his hand, but DDP walks right past it. He walks over to the contract and goes to sign his name but stops. He grabs a mic that was also on the table.
With all that said, DDP signs the contract and slams the mic down and goes to leave. Before DDP can exit the ring, Booker T steps in his way and has a mic of his own.
Booker drops the mic and stares DDP down, DDP is seething and tries to drop Booker T with a Diamond Cutter, but Booker sees it coming and shoves DDP off. This causes DDP to crash into Ric Flair and send the Nature Boy on his butt. DDP rolls out of the ring and grabs the World Heavyweight title and begins to speed walk up the ramp. Booker goes to help Flair up, only to have Flair shove him off and seem like he’s ready to fight. Booker tells Flair to relax, and Flair seems to calm down as we head too commercial.
We have a Barry Horwitz sighting in 2001! BG James and Sean O'Haire waste zero time isolating Kwee Wee early on, showcasing some surprisingly fluid, heavy-hitting teamwork. Horwitz eventually tags in, but James immediately cuts him down with a stiff running forearm. James quickly tags in O'Haire, who hoists a dazed Horwitz and plants him hard with a Death Spiral, hooking the leg to secure a dominant, rapid pinfall victory.
If you’re going to have them challenge for the tag team titles, you need to establish them as a tag team and that’s what this match helps do. O’Haire & James are not natural partners, but I think there is potential there.
Celebrating in the ring, James & O’Haire are quickly attacked by Kanyon & Mike Awesome! The champions take out the challengers from behind, hitting both with a title belt shot to the back of the head. Awesome then lifts up James and plants him with an Awesome Bomb, and Kanyon levels O’Haire with a Flatliner to leave the challengers grounded as Kanyon & Awesome raise their titles above their heads.
Back from Commercial and Jazz is on her way to the ring. Already there is Papaya, the former valet of Kwee Wee I believe. The women are ready and the bell rings. Jazz decks Papaya with big lariat then locks in an STF and Papaya immediately taps.
You can barely call that a match. Jazz needs to destroy someone and it seems like Joanie is out of the Women’s division. After the match Jazz is celebrating and hops out of the ring with her title. She is jawing with some fans then sees Jerry Lawler at the commentary desk. She gets right in his face and is yelling about his obsession with puppies and bikini babes before pie facing “The King” and walking away and Styles implores Lawler to keep his cool.
Backstage, Scott Hudson is joined by Shane Helms & Rey Mysterio. Hudson asks Helms how it feels to have Mysterio back in WCW. Helms says Mysterio has for years been the best Cruiserweight in the world, and Helms has respected everything he’s done in this business. He not only is excited to see Mysterio back in WCW, he’s excited to measure himself against Mysterio one day. Mysterio says he appreciates it. At Starrcade its every man for himself, so maybe Helms will get his chance soon enough. Helms says may the best man win, and he and Mysterio shake hands.
The cruiserweight action starts fast, but the real story here is the clear friction between Billy Kidman and Chavo Guerrero Jr., who constantly argue over tags and blindside one another to steal the spotlight. Despite their volatile tension, the heels manage to maintain control over Karagias and Hayashi with a some big moves and even a few double team maneuvers. Late in the match, Hayashi mounts a furious comeback, but Chavo shuts it down with a thumb to the eye before nailing a vicious Gory Bomb. Kidman aggressively tags himself in by slapping Chavo's back, sliding over Hayashi to steal the 3.
What do you need to say about WCW Cruiserweight matches? They are always so fun, but there is always something holding them slightly back from that next level most of the time. I enjoyed the idea of Mysterio & Helms getting along going into Starrcade contrasting with the heels not being able to get along.
After the match, Chavo gets in Kidman’s face and begins yelling he had the match one. Kidman raises his hands up as if to calm the situation, but then deck’s Chavo with a big right hand. The two begin brawling immediately as referees and security fill the ring to pull them apart.
Norman Smiley tries to keep things light with his usual comedic stalling, but Steve Corino is in no mood for games, aggressively targeting Smiley with stiff forearms and short-arm clotheslines. Smiley rallies with a sudden series of atomic drops and even teases the Big Wiggle to a loud ovation, but Corino pulls the referee in and then uses the distraction to hit a low blow on Smiley! Corino stays on the attack, grabbing Smiley and hitting an Old School Expulsion and the pinfall victory.
This seemed like a nothing match, but Smiley & Corino really put on a great little piece of work here. The idea was to get Corino some heat and a win, and this did it.
Corino grabs a match and begins laughing. He says Joanie Laurer thinks she has a chance to compete against someone like Steve Corino? Look what just happened to Norman Smiley? If that’s what happens to him, imagine what would happen to a “little girl.” Joanie Laurer’s music hits and out comes the “9th Wonder” and she’s not alone! She has WCW President Ric Flair with her. Joanie says she went to Arn Anderson last week asking to wrestle Corino and Anderson said she had to prove herself, and she beat Disqo last week like he was nothing. So she went to Mr. Flair this week, and Flair had an answer for her. Flair grabs the mic and simply says “Corino vs. Laurer! To be the woman you gotta beat the man! Starrcade! WOO!” I think that means the match is official.
Backstage we are in Arn’s office as he watches Flair make the announcement. CW Anderson & Pete Gas barge-in and say they need to talk to Arn. Arn seems annoyed, but before he can say anything, Disqo & Sanders come barging in saying they need a match at Starrcade! Arn tells them to hold on a minute and here comes Buff Bagwell also to demand a match. Arn says everyone needs to shut up and get out of his office and opens the door. As he does so The FBI is standing outside the door with Guido seemingly rehearsing with Palumbo & Stamboli how they are going to demand a match at Starrcade. Anderson puts his head in his hands as we fade too commercial.
The Portraits of Poise attempt to dominate this match early on with their size and athleticism, but they are constantly foiled by the Shark Squad's comedic antics. Stasiak tries a standard lockup, but La Sharka completely brushes him off and does a deep-sea dance, while Shark Boy leaves Jindrak completely flustered by repeatedly trying to bite his hands and fingers. The Portraits of Poise eventually manage to use their strength advantage to isolate Shark Boy, cutting the ring in half and looking like they are on the verge of securing a victory. Suddenly, the Misfits In Action, including by a returning Corporal Cajun, march out onto the stage, shouting distractions and completely breaking the focus of the Portraits of Poise. Seizing the absolute chaos, Shark Girl sneaks up behind an unfocused Stacy Keibler and rolls her up tightly to score a shocking victory!
That was fine I guess. Shark Squad is getting a pretty good reaction already, and I did not see this victory coming for them. Stacy Keibler simply isn’t a wrestler and it shows though. And though Mark Jindrak is athletic, its almost as if he doesn’t know what to do with it yet.
After the match, The Shark Squad celebrates and runs up the ramp right past the Misfits in Action. General Rection has a mic in hand. He tells the Portraits of Poise that the Misfits in Action are back at full strength with Corporal Cajun off medical leave and back by their side. As far as Reciton sees it, there’s three Misfits, and three Prima Donna’s in the ring, so Rection proposes it’s the Misftis In Action vs. the Portraits of Poise at Starrcade!
This highly anticipated chapter in their Best of 5 series mirrors their last encounter, but with every move seemingly having yet a new counter, delivering a breathtaking masterclass pro wrestling. Huntsville crowd unloads on Storm as he controls the tempo, with Dawn Marie screeching instructions from ringside. Van Dam mounts a comeback, throwing everything he has at the champion with a series of kicks and a Split-Legged Moonsault for a 2. Late in the contest, Storm sends RVD into the ropes and is looking for a Rolling Canadian Maple Leaf. However, in a brilliant burst of leverage, Rob Van Dam rolls all the way through the maneuver, shifting his weight perfectly into a tight roll-up pin to get the three count!
For exactly half a second, I wondered if I would get sick of watching Lance Storm vs. Rob Van Dam, and the answer is no. I’m guessing this is setting up the final of the best of 5 being at Starrcade, and I’m on board! Sometimes the best part of Professional Wrestling is Professional Wrestling. After the match, RVD grabs the US title and celebrates his way up the ramp. He stops at the top and stares down Storm, doing his signature Thumb Pointing Taunt as Lance Storm seethes with Dawn Marie in the ring.